You just made me feel so damn special
omg so im topless lying on my bed and i forgot my nail clippers are on my bed and i just leaned forward and the nail clipper closed. on my nipple. ouch
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
you called me and cried until i agreed to record a rap about our lives with you
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
It was the classiest, most strategic and inspired vomiting I've ever witnessed. Like a blind mans first sunrise. A priests first prayer. Or a virgins first orgasm.
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
EVERYTHING IS DISNEY. Even my sexting can lead to Disney.
I do remember that in my dream I wasn't impressed with his dick.
Fun fact. A penis can be used to catapult cheetos.
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Randomize
