Duck Duck Cougar?
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Sunday was the 8 month anniversary when you shot me in the face...just an FYI.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
But he's super into Jesus and I'm the devil. So we weren't meant to be
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
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