Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
Dude, so the police showed up at my house with my wallet told me they found it in the church fountain then handed me a pamphlet on AA saying it was from the pastor. What happend?
Then this bride walked into the bar, she thought it would be a good idea to hug her & then she started playing parachute with her train.
she just announce I'm david copper field and tried to shove a napkin down my throat
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
I also farted in bed this morning and said, "I don't even care. My body deserves that."
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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