The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
Just printed out my Plan B coupon at the library. Saving my own printer ink and paper as well as 10 dollars towards not being knocked up.
I'm sitting in the middle of them on his bed, forcing them to watch Brokeback Mountain. I am the best cock blocker ever.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
Are you scared? I basically plan on us looking like giant drunk skittles
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
I come into the house and he's fucking doing karaoke by himself... Lady gaga
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Can you recommend a quality dick? I haven’t had a good sexing in a while
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