I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Please stop sending me picture messages of your shit. Seriously. I don't care if it looks like popcorn chicken.
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I was surprised he admitted he couldnt keep up. We both knew but usually they dont come out and say it
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
God gave him joint rollers for hands
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
it's like my ID runs away from me when it knows it's time for me to drink
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize