Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
He just showed up to brunch with one shoe and only the battery from his phone.
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
If I don't get to have sex with him soon my entire female reproductive system is gonna climb out of my body and choke me to death
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Me-World Problems: do I have my boyfriend come to my birthday party in drag, or is that too weird for the first time meeting literally any of my friends
Randomize
