dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
My roommate took my designated hickey removing spoon out of the freezer.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
This morning confirmed it...there's no maybe about it. She definitely wasn't born with it. It was definitely the Maybelline.
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
As you were leaving you yelled at the owners that the stairs weren't suitable for "intoxacapated" people and promptly fell down them.
So I WAS right.
i just woke up on the desk in his dorm with him snoring in my vagina. better than last week waking up to a different guy puking on my bare ass i guess.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
