Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Yes. Hungover. All the boys are going wakeboarding. Boys only. I wish I was a gay guy so I could go wakeboarding but still suck dick.
then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
You started a dance party so that you could steal their vodka and shouted "sailors out!"
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
I know. he thinks we're 'meant to be'. No we're fucking not. God wouldn't give my soulmate a pencil dick.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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