so i'm sitting in his room drinking tequila from the bottle and watching harry potter. he's jacking off to some porn a couple feet away from me. at one point i look over and see that he's watching me instead of the porn. please help me figure out how warped it is that i found that romantic
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Alive...but barely. Had dinner with my parents tonight which was conveniently located near where i left my car, phone, and self respect
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
Why is our fridge full of girl scout cookies and rum?
You told me to go grocery shopping.
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
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