I come up with the best drinking games while babysitting
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
He was using OnStar to get directions to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'd have gotten her number too if I hadn't disconnected the call.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
That's the first time I've ever heard something that tickled both my gag reflex and my penis simultaneously.
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
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