i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
I love drunk self when he leaves a prepacked bong for the morning... in the bathroom.
It's taking 3 penises to fill the hole he left in my heart.
Dude, those shrooms u gave me made me remember writing the bible. Fuckn awesome
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Whenever I have a bad day I just look at the negetive pregnancy test I keep in my purse and remind myself things could be alot worse.
When I came she triumphantly exclaimed, "MUAHAHA VICTORY IS MINE!"
Randomize