think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
And then I have a slight inkling that I went up to the bar and tried to order the bartender.
so I got guilt tripped into giving her a new years kiss, and she proceeded to try and eat my face while mounting me. when you give a mouse a cookie...
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
we were sitting on his couch watching tv and laughing at how funny the voices on the commercial were, then we realized the volume wasn't on.
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
You told me that you couldn't come over because you felt like you were gonna die and that houses eat you when you die, and my house couldn't eat you because your house would be jealous. That's when I knew to take the bowl away from you.
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
