I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
Why did you make me get in the car with you and then not give me a ride? I woke up in a bar with a blanket on me.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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