Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Vibrating panties would be amazing during this conversation!
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
she has a fucking refrigerator full of four loko and is charging 15 dollars a can.... she is like a mini donald trump
I'd just like to give a shout out to jesus and plan b for making this day possible.
The vodka told me to go iceskating on my frozen pool. I may have attempted.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
It's not really that big. Girls just think it feels big. It's a cocktical illusion.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Randomize
