That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
When i'm home next we need to get baked and go to waffle house. I want to see if the waitress can still guess my intoxication level and what i'm about to order before i even make it to the table.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
There's a potato with a bite taken out of it in the kitchen
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
