You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
im glad to be known as "the girl you had sex with on a golf course"
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
Idk if you've ever tried hysterically crying in the shower listening to Florence + The Machine but it's honestly a life-affirming experience
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
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