I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Is there a fine for having sex in the back of a zipcar?
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
His dad and I had a drunk conversation about life. At 4 am he told me that I was 21 and cute and should fuck whoever I want.
I named my Roomba after my pot dealer. I have a problem, don't i?
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
I hate waking up to a room that reeks of bad decisions...
He wanted me to do the rubix cube. He thought it was hot.
Randomize
