i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
I had it in my eyebrows, my bangs, under one eye, and across both cheeks. Congratulations on the successful and elusive warpaint cumshot.
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Burnt myself on soup.. consencus go back to hospl. they will lov me. twins in one nigh. still hve band on. fuck
Some old truck driver just made me smell his beard I hope tonight turns out better
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
In other news it turns out I like Heineken.. In a desert island kind of way
I'm not gonna get my cat high anymore because what if he has a heart attack. I don't want to be responsible for that shit
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
i just thought a plastic bag was my cat. i just pet a plastic bag. that high.
BOOOOOOOOOOOO *takes away your hoe card*
So he has moved up to a stage 5 clinger...Surprised he didn't try to lure you into bed with tacos, like he did last time
Yeah... akward. I don't want a round 2
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize