bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
After he came, I wiped my mouth on my baby blanket. I could feel nana rolling over in her grave.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
Randomize
