Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I sent dad a photo of my graduation certificate from drug therapy class. It was his birthday so it seemed appropriate.
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
I need to have sex. It's becoming like a matter of public safety.
I'm not allowed to have sex with him again. My vagina joined in on the protest. There was a petition. All my body parts signed it.
for once I'd like a one night stand where I don't meet the guys mom or wife in the morning
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize
