woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
Mate, you pissed in my bed. Then told me to "Just keep swimming"
Your rough animalistic sex sounds are disrupting my cocktail hour
Well, if worst comes to worst, I have pictures of his penis that I can put on the internet
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I will not abuse the gift that was given to me
You were given a vagina and you abuse that pretty hard
Randomize
