everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
I don't know who he was, where he came from, or where he went, but he just handed me a bowl of mac and cheese and left. It was good too.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
we all took turns holding you up and pretending that you were simba and that we were presenting you to the jungle
We're walking, taxis are a waste of money that can be spent on alcohol.
I can't straight up say the only reason I smoked a couple bowls with you was for your three legged cat
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
And then he dove into my vagina like scrooge mcduck into a room of gold
I should've left when he told me that he only smoked crack by accident once
Maybe those shots of hot dog water wasn’t a good idea after killing a fifth of tequila.. but who’s askin
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