how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
a garbage man just dropped off my phone and wallet. he found them in the trash this morning.
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Pretty sure I humiliated the fuck out of myself last night after I was dared to attempt to give myself head. I hate vodka
Also, my aunt grabbed my phone and downloaded the scriptures. Apparently I need Jesus.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I banged a marine last night. No wonder everybody respects them.
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