im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
so this was truly a case of the blacked out leading the blacked out.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Coffee's working. Just killed a fly with my bare hands.\nFuck with me.
hey sweets how's ur crotch today?
Randomize
