my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
I got drunk enough that when camel suggested jumping off the pier, I thought it was a fantastic plan. Also my blood hurts.
I'm your Election Erection Connection
I retroactively revoke all sex we've ever had.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I'm not sure what is worse, the fact that Hoffman doesn't sell vodka before 9am or that I was trying to buy vodka at 8:30am.
Got dumped. Now accepting nominations for my extra Dave Mathews ticket. No xboyfriends. Must cast final votes by Monday. Good luck everyone
Any recommendations for how to tell your wife about the pics of her 19 yr old sister on a porn site without admitting you were surfing said porn site?
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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