How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
God I love incriminating evidence...wonder what the statue of limitations is on shitting on someones driveway
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
he kept telling me how much his girlfriend would love me while we were making. why does tequila always do this to me?
I don't care if he got kidnapped by a cult one time he is a dick
Note to self: don't practice nerdy white girl dance choreography in the company bathrooms no matter how nice the huge mirrors and lighting are.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
I sent her a video on Snapchat of me cumming, with a Father's Day snap filter that said "#1 Dad".
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize