Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
You must take up my position now. You must pass out in awkward places as I taught you... Sears a hotel elevator and Burger King bathroom. You potential for greater young grasshopper.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
Randomize
