guys are only as good as the porn they watch
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Def regretting not writing "will blow for extra credit" on my last final
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
you picked up the vacuum cleaner at one point and said you we gonna beat the shit out of me with it. that was kinda funny
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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