He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
Just found my car keys in your throw-up.
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
I think I just inadvertently started a sex competition with my roommate and her boyfriend.
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Dude. Some drunk chick just put an Aussie hat on me and was screaming at me in German. Her friends had to drag her away. Point being, I now have a cool hat.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize