I got to see an enormous amount of vagina this morning.
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
You walked away saying that you had to pee and you never came back. We found you an hour later in his roommate's bed. Under the covers. Still in your wet bathing suit.
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Before you jump in that vagina remember there's a reason we call her Infectonator.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
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