sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
we sixty- nined on a tennis court.. not even drunk. you say insane. i say creative genius.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Haha do not judge my life style choices right now but me and Dj had sex twice and then he helped me pick an outfit out for my date
Randomize
