I have demons in me.
I sware she could use her own nose as a dildo.
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
and you're not allowed to put a penis in you if it's attached to a 26 year old who works at blockbuster
Just walked in and was handcuffed to a police woman. Fire fighter woman poured franzia down my throat. Aaaaand I just ate cookies off of Little Red Riding Hood's tits.
That's okay, during storytime I would have to sit on my hands so I wouldn't touch everyone. Explains a lot...
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Woke up with chlamydia and a bruised rib. I'd say my boss is gonna be mad about me not showing up to work, except you know.. it's her fault.
What do I do with all this pork broth? I can't waste it.
CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG CHUG
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
The bar brought brought it upon themselves, they played billy joels piano man before closing, it's not our fault the bar isn't a bar anymore, right?
Randomize
