when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
i am YELPING strip clubs. This is interesting.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I ate vegetarian today, so I deserve a beer.That's my justification.
It's like you're the voice of my soul.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
almost dropped my phone in the toilet but it somehow bounced off my tit and landed on the floor. Boobs: saving me hundreds of dollars in bar tabs and smartphones since '09
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
I don't really feel bad about it, but I legit just squirted in the back of an Uber and it makes me think how many times has this happened before?!?!
We popped the air mattress last night via sex and we just kept going but it feels like I have a bruise on every vertebrae
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Randomize
