I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
If I had known I was gonna take my tights off and throw them over the balcony I would have shaved my legs.
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
It's official, my little sister has hooked up with more girls than I have.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
She just causally held my limp dick in her hand the entire movie. Her parents were cuddling on the couch too..that brave!
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I'm a professor! I can't be caught chasing the liquor with you hooligans once the undergrads have seen my face
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize