Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
Couch. On fire.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize
