So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
Then. Omg he showed me A CARD TRICK AFTER WE CAME
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
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