your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Dude, I just went to take a piss and looked at my ballsack... Underneath was labled "L" and "R"
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
So somebody asked her is she's okay.She turned around,started running and screamed "Ballet is running through my veins" before doing a small pirouette.It's amazing how she managed not to fall.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
What's that? Is there a bottle of Jack calling me? I think so...
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
This is the most aggressive rendition of that Proclaimers song I ever heard.
Randomize
