This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
you rubbed the head of my dick and said "I shall call you Squishy and you shall be mine and you shall be my Squishy."
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
i'm calling it girls night to make myself feel better but lets be real.....i wasn't going to get any guys tonight regardless
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
Why do I think he'd like to keep my hair in a box?
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I have a tattoo that says Yolo. You should not have been asking my advice in the first place
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
Randomize
