brb k???!! plz don't leave i want 2 tlk bout r rltnshp
oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
Your little brother is asking me for an "expert opinion" on his dick size.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
Randomize