I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Segways are the fanny packs of transportation. Useful in some situations, but you always look like a tool when using one.
I'm totally counting that party when he kept putting his hands down my pants as a date.
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
why did your cousin post "out tonight" on facebook? doesn't he know it's only 1 in the afternoon?
shhh don't tell him. it's cloudy out and none of his clocks work
no dont talk to me..because of you my bar tab was more expensive than my hospital bill
The fact that its 530pm and I'm saying to myself I should sober up since I'm at a family establishment should say enough
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
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