East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
can you please not set my house on fire for once???
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
Randomize
