It was just pointed out to me in a meeting that there is a lipstick stain on my crotch.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
They were lying down in the parking garage pretending to be speed bumps...
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
This is the 4th time we've hooked up, and this morning we woke up, he got out of bed and left. Left me alone in his apartment with 3 of his friends. Without even a word. Why do i like this guy?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
I danced with a french guy who licked the sweat off my neck and poured a drink on me. Not gonna lie, that shit was refreshing
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I found a hair colour I want in a porn.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize
