I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
spending the week with her family was quite possibly the longest ive ever gone without having a boner
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I was high last night eating a fudge bar and making eggs with toast and corned beef hash for a 2 am snack and my dad asked what I was and the only reply I could think of was "I'm an adult."
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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