6:33 AM: I'm drunk at this time of morning.
too bad you live with your parents still
im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
I told a kindergarten student that candy canes are bones of reject elves.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize
