I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
11am puke and rally. THIS is what I'm gonna miss about college.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm having a really difficult time dealing with the fact that my dog now shares a name with Snooki's crotch-spawn.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Selling our snow shovel to buy more beer. Not your brightest idea.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
All I remember is that I was trying to call my wolf pack by howling.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
Randomize
