An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
Some dude with an OSU jersey just kissed him in the face in front of everyone. I should mention he's wearing a Panda costume. And has already been offered $20 for his suit by Plushies for oral sex.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
are you inviting me to ice cream?
the subtext of everything i say to you is inviting you to ice cream
Randomize
