All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Sorry about teling your dad i'd have sex with him last night in front of your mom while i was drunk
I wanted to google "huge banana" but I'm pretty sure all I'd get is dick pictures.
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
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