I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
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