I got three cases. When they asked for id I said it was suspended for drunk driving.
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
the fact that i already established a hook up buddy for thanksgiving break is genius
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
So I just went to clothing optional bar
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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