Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
You threw a beachball full of vodka at me and yelled I CHOOSE YOU then ran
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Randomize
