is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Defrosting my uncrustable with my laptop...Hungover dinner
This really high kid past out in the corner of the room holding a box of cheez its in his arm. My idol.
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
