thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
they pretty much knew i was there to get drunk and fuck their daughter
Was that picture taken before or after I supposedly punched him in the face?
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
She's doing hand stands on the train as I type. Idk if I'm impressed it embarrassed. Or turned on.
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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